What we've been up to

It's been quite a while since I've posted.  Here is what we are up to:

Susie -- using the big girl potty! She's done well, and usually has a selection of books to read while she's in there. :)  She's also getting pretty great at "reading" out loud to Chip.  She likes to read Dr. Seuss books, especially Green Eggs and Ham and The Ear Book.  She can recognize the letters S, O, Y, X and E.  I am not sure where she picked them all up!

Chip -- smiling, bouncy seat, tummy time and getting chubby.  It's a full time job, and he's OH so sweet!

I'm reading Loving the Little Years and Give Them Grace right now.  Both very good and encouraging.  I'm getting ready to move to becoming a full time SAHM, which I'm really looking forward to!  Big plans to read more and write more on the blog.  But mainly. . . snuggle my kids and play with them more.

My story as a preemie mom

I've been wanting to write about my experience with having a preemie in the special care nursery for quite a while now, but having 2 little ones at home, I haven't been able to catch enough brain power to write about it. :)  This is meant to encourage other moms who may find themselves in this situation unplanned.  I'll put out a warning that there is going to be some breastfeeding info going down in this post, so if that does not apply to you, feel free to skip it!  I am by no means an expert, but I do think I learned a few lessons that could be helpful to someone else in my place.


The story:
When my son was born at 35+ weeks, I figured he'd have a lengthier hospital stay and perhaps be put in a special nursery.  Since I delivered at a hospital without a NICU, I was praying that he wouldn't move to the children's hospital downtown, and thankfully the Lord answered that prayer!  My hospital did have a special care nursery, however, and babies taken there are obviously guarded more rigorously, but not having been in that situation, I did not know what the set up would be.  He had to stay in the SCN and I could come to visit him there, but he was not able to come to my room with me.  After my c-section I held him and nursed him in recovery, and then he was admitted to the SCN.  My husband walked down to see him later that night since I could not go in my big bed since it was during a shift change.  I told my nurse that I'd like to go down as soon as I was allowed out of bed the next morning (like at 4am), so that is what we did.  I was still hooked up like crazy, and pushed in a wheelchair, but the aide cheerfully took me down to see my baby.  He had an NG tube down his nose where he was given formula, and the nurse caring for him was about to give him a bottle.  

Let me interject here that I do not think poorly of those nurses.  I LOVED most of our nurses!!

 This young nurse briskly told me that after I had been there for a while she would show me how to do the bottle. . . I was aghast!  In my foggy early morning state of mind, sitting there watching my tiny baby, I felt sure that something must be wrong with him and that was why they weren't letting me nurse him again.  Out of fear to hear bad news I shied away from asking to nurse him, which I see now was completely foolish!  This same nurse told us that most babies in the SCN stayed until their due dates.  We were dumbfounded.  We assumed that since he wasn't on oxygen, we'd be ok MUCH sooner than that!  This experience leads me to

Lesson #1 -- Many nurses are wonderful, but get the info from the neonatologist.

We were blessed with some amazing and kind neonatologists.  I immediately got a completely different vibe when Dr. Obi assessed my baby and spoke with me (a few hours later).  She assured me he was fine, just small, and that she was going to order some tests to rule out possible problems.  She was thrilled at his ability to nurse (a refrain I never tired of hearing, but heard quite a bit over the next week) and was incredibly pro-breastfeeding.  She encouraged me to do kangaroo care and come to the SCN when he was going to have his feedings through the NG tube so that he could "nurse" at the same time and get the sucking/getting full belly sensation.  She even wrote that into his orders (which I overheard) so I could refer to it when other nurses were present.  Many of our nurses were pro-breastfeeding/kangaroo care, but every few shifts someone would cycle in that gave this mom the feeling that I was in the way.  They may try to talk me into skipping a feeding (true, it was a hassle for them to have me stumble in every few hours and need screens set up around me so I could nurse) or question why I was trying to take him to the breast since he was early (apparently preemie boys have a bad reputation of being poor nursers).  Since I had connected with my neonatologist, I was able to gently but firmly establish my plans for teaching my baby to be exclusively breast fed.  

I could go on and on about Dr. Obi and the other neonatologists I encountered.  They were simply wonderful, and I see God's hand in giving them to me!  I also have a friend who works in SCN (though she was off the week Chip was born) who gave me the 411 on the other people who worked there!  It was great to have that insight!  However, I know that might not be a possibility for other people, so I want to share another lesson I learned:

Lesson #2 -- embrace the lactation consultants, because they are in your corner!

When so many people are telling you what to do, it's natural to sort of avoid more input, but do not skip over this one!  I probably met every LC that worked at my hospital because when I was asked if I wanted to lactation to come by I always said yes, if they were available.  Everyone has different personalities and it's likely you won't just click with everyone, but those ladies were extremely helpful to me.  They made my seats comfortable, got me drinks and pillows, and most importantly, they were my cheerleaders.  I knew we shared a goal in getting to exclusive breastfeeding, so I could depend on their help!  Here are some tips I got from them:

• pump, even when you don't feel like it, especially right after holding your preemie.  It's a hassle but it will help your milk come in. (I HATED pumping, I wanted my baby instead!  But DO IT!)
• call them to help you and don't be afraid you are interrupting.  
• proper holding of baby and breast to make latching work (esp. helpful if you are a 1st time nursing mom)
• let people take care of you so you can rest.
• ways to wake up your sleepy preemie:  wet wipes on bare skin (ohhhhhh!!), pumping little arms, rubbing under chin when he pauses eating, or just holding skin to skin for a while.   

Since I had already successfully breastfed my first baby, I felt just a bit more confident about asserting myself when it was time for a feeding, but in such an emotional time, you need someone in your corner, and the lactation consultants are great for that!  

Lesson 3 -- be winsome, but make your baby your priority, not having everyone like you.
I wanted all of Chip's nurses to like me so they didn't groan to see me coming every hour or two.  I tried to be conversational and complimentary to them -- those were some hard working ladies and many of them appreciated conversation with a mom in the middle of the night (esp. since there was often only one nurse working in the SCN during our time there).  However, I learned the hard way that that was not my greatest priority.  One day I left the SCN after chatting with the nurse about her hair color, and feeling like she really liked me.  Later when I returned, a new nurse was working (Teresa) and told me that Chip's feeding schedule changed because that nurse gave him a supplement of formula through his NG tube about an hour after I'd left.  I was totally dismayed, and expressed to Teresa that I wished she would have called me to come back and feed him again if she thought he was hungry!  I had started storing up a bit of breastmilk that I wanted him to have, but for whatever reason, she didn't use it!  I guess I'd hoped that since she liked me then she would automatically be super pro-breastfeeding mom, but I didn't exactly spell out my wishes to her either, so it was just as much my fault.  Teresa and I were much better at communicating, and she was fantastic about calling me as soon as Chip started to act hungry, even if it were a bit early for his scheduled feeding.  This was as close to "on-demand feeding" I could get in this situation, and I was very thankful for it!  After that night when a sweet sister from my church cared for Chip, and called me when he acted hungry not an hour after I'd left, we turned a corner.  He gained a few ounces every day, and best of all they removed his NG tube!  


Lesson #4 -- Trust the Lord for He IS good.
Many people will tell you that life with a preemie is a roller coaster.  You get all excited as they do very well, but then devastated with a set back.  Certainly postpartum emotions and hormones play into this roller coaster experience as well!  You absolutely must continually reaffirm in your mind that God is good and he is caring both for you and for your tiny one.  He gives life and breath and all things.  Steep your mind in Scripture, maybe even just one passage that you can read over and over and embrace.  Or listen to good songs that will comfort your heart.  For me, the song "Oh the Deep Deep Love of Jesus" by Sovereign Grace was an immense encouragement.  I played it over and over on my MP3 player, and then when the batteries died on it (probably because I'd fall asleep listening to it), I just hit replay over and over on the YouTube video.  The last few days of our hospital stay Chip had a less than helpful nurse that enjoyed giving me news in a way that made it seem like more of a dire situation than it was.  Right after I was allowed to have Chip come to my room, he "desatted" in the early morning hours and I had to keep him hooked up to a monitor when he was with me even.  This meant I couldn't sleep with him in the room because it made noises on a consistent basis and frequently sounded false alarms (so scary!).  It was such a blow to have this happen when things were going so well, and you can imagine I cried many tears to the Lord at that time!  But my faith was rock solid in the Lord's goodness to us -- sometimes you must fight for that faith!  

I'm sure there are many other people out there who have experienced far worse situations and have stories to tell, but this is mine.  I hope someone is encouraged by it, and I'd love to pray for you or help you with any insight I may have!

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Big Sister meets Baby Brother

A nurse let Josh bring Susie into the special care nursery for a few seconds to see her brother.

Holding Baby Chip for the first time.  The kisses were plentiful.

Welcome to this world, Baby Chip!

Our baby boy was born into this world unexpectedly on May 9th, 2011.  This is the story of how he came to us.

For the last several weeks, my doctor had been concerned that my baby was not growing like he should be.  I was measuring smaller and smaller at each appointment, and was not gaining much weight.  We had multiple ultrasounds to determine his size, the amount of fluid, and general health of the baby.  The conclusion kept being that he was small but healthy, so nothing to be alarmed about at that point.  I went in every few days (and last week, every 2 days) to either have a non stress test done or have him looked at via ultrasound.  I also did kick counts at night.  My doctor was GREAT -- she was concerned but not freaking out, and just really stayed on top of the situation.  She called me on her cell phone after updates, she was super attentive and involved.  I am so thankful for her -- the Lord, in His sovereignty gave us this wonderful woman who cared for me and my baby.  


I will say during that time when I was going to so many appointments and having to do the kick counts, the Lord was very gracious to keep us from worrying.  For the most part, I did not struggle with fear, but of course that did come from time to time.  Over the weekend, I could tell his kicks were not as active.  He moved, but it was more like flutters, and took a bit longer to count to ten.  Continually I prayed and trusted the Lord with our child, who He created -- he is the giver of life, and all things belong to him.

Monday morning we went to another ultrasound at the hospital.  The doctor said "so you're getting really close -- what is your delivery date?"  I told him May 31st, and he said "no, this report says delivery at 36 or 37 weeks."  Josh and I were very surprised.  At my last ultrasound, the doctor had not told me that was his recommendation, but apparently put it in the report.  Immediately our minds were whirling.  The ultrasound showed what I had suspected by the kick counts -- that he was sort of resting, and focusing blood flow to the brain.  His BPP was good, and he appeared totally healthy, but the specialist doctor sent me to see my OB and have an non stress test done.  At her office, she saw the same thing playing out on the non stress test -- a consistent heart rate, but a flat line, no big accelerations.  She said we could deliver that night or the next morning, and if it were in the morning, I should stay at the hospital overnight for monitoring.  Well, with that being my choice, I chose that night of course!

She let us go home to pack our stuff (after we were able to wake the baby up a bit and get him to act up a bit more), and make our arrangements.  I had to be checked into labor and delivery by six for an eight o clock c-section.

I tried to enjoy the time with Susie that afternoon, and not be anxious about my baby's condition.  Truly, the Lord was near, and I had peace.  I did feel relived once we were at the hospital and the monitor on the baby showed a normal heart rate.  My blood pressure started to rise shortly before the surgery, and I'll never forget the feeling of tension -- sort of a feeling that I couldn't make small talk.  I asked the Lord to give me grace and help me to relax, and again, that prayer was answered.  I felt really calm during the operation -- much better than during Susie's c-section when my body sort of went into shock.  

Shortly after our little guy was pulled out -- we heard it!  A cry!  I couldn't see anything, of course, but Josh was narrating for me.  He was teeny, but just fine.  "Go take a picture of him!" I said so I could see him, but I didn't need to worry about that.  They let Josh bring him up by my to see him nice and close.  I had been prepared for our baby being whisked off by doctors and nurses as soon as he was born, but here he was, snuggling by us.  He weighed a tiny 4 pounds 5.2 ounces!  That was smaller than the last ultrasound had even indicated, but he looked just like Susie did -- fully developed with a cute face.

Our wonderful doctor

After my c-section, Dr. Nusz came over and gave me a hug.  I was crying and hugged her so hard, and thanked her.  She showed me the placenta and umbilical cord after that, because they confirmed her suspicions that there was a problem there.  The placenta was small -- about 2/3 the size of a normal one, and the cord was not normal either.  Dr. Nusz told me that when she tugged on the cord, it detached from the placenta pretty easily.  All the nurses and doctors were gathering around to see, and kept telling me I was lucky I hadn't gone into labor.  I was overwhelmed by God's providence.  None of this was our plan, but it was His, and He was so good to us! Since then, I've learned that the placenta was analyzed and indeed, it was beginning to wear down, and that is why my baby had slowed down growing.  Like the Psalmist says in Psalm 139 "my frame was not hidden from you when I was being made in secret, intricately woven in the depths of the earth". 


My biggest hope was that I would be able to hold this baby during recovery since I had to wait so long to hold Susie after she was born.  I wanted to try to nurse him if I could, but kind of expected he'd be gone by then.  But I was wrong!  Once they wheeled me into recovery, the special care nurse brought my baby Chip into me to hold skin to skin (this hospital does kangaroo care) and try to get him to eat.  I'm not sure how long he stayed with me, but probably about an hour.  I was able to rest after that, satisfied that I had seen my baby first!  


This week has been long and trying at times, but mostly just sweet.  The Lord gave me the song "O the Deep Deep Love of Jesus" -- I like the Sovereign Grace version from the album "Come Weary Saints".  The words are so beautiful and comforting when passing through murky waters.  "Oh the deep deep love, all I need and trust, is the deep deep love of Jesus".  I've listened to this song over and over these past days.  I trust his deep love for me, and I can trust his care for us.


We named him Charles Altman.  Charles is Josh's great-grandfather's name, and Altman is his mother's maiden name.  We chose Charles because we wanted to call him Chip -- after Chip Stam, a man we love and admire, and we pray our son would grow to be like him.  As Chip Stam led many to worship Christ, we hope our baby Chip will proclaim Christ and lead others to worship and adore him.  Even through his birth and young life we hope people will see the sovereignty and goodness of God and marvel "such knowledge is too wonderful for me; it is high, I cannot attain it."

Charles "Chip" Altman Neisler born May 9th, 2011, 4lbs 5oz, 17 inches long.  Rejoicing over God's goodness to us in this precious gift!

Thinking more about Chip Stam

My mind is full of memories these days.  When someone passes away, I love nothing more than to reminisce about them.  I think many people in my church felt this way -- the night Chip died, it seemed that Facebook was flooded with Cliftonites and former members posting thoughts, videos, and memories of this dear man.  We had a little online memory fest, and so many quotes that were posted I could hear coming right from Chip's mouth, in his tone and style.  

I don't have any pictures of my own to add to the mix, but I did want to pull out a few memories, things that I have tucked away in my mind as special and significant.  Here are some ramblings in no particular order:


1. One Sunday night Chip led us in the song based on the poem by William Cowper "God Moves in a Mysterious Way".  He said something along the lines of "you can't sing along this time unless you have suffered and seen the Lord to be faithful" (I think he was semi-joking).  At that point, I felt like I had not actually ever suffered in my life, and realized that the words we were singing weren't as significant to me as they were to him.  As time moved on, however, this song became one of the most significant songs I knew.  Shortly after my mom died, I read a biography of John Newton that told in depth about the poem Cowper penned and the truth of God's sovereignty over human suffering resounded in my heart as never before.  Over the course of the next several months, when I was gripped with fear these words would come to mind when I needed them most, for instance when Susie's heart rate dropped while I was in labor.  I am so thankful for Chip teaching me not only this incredibly precious song, but how to embrace the truth in its words while in the midst of trial.


2. My first service back to Clifton after my mom died, Chip led the congregation in "Great is Thy Faithfulness" and told a story about its author, Thomas Chisholm.  Chip's grandfather knew Chisholm back when they were both Gideons, and told about how this man had become nearly destitute as he cared for his ailing wife.  How sweet the words to that chorus were -- "all I have needed Thy hand hath provided".  My sisters and I had sung this song to my mom while she was in the intensive care unit just a few weeks before, and singing it with my church family that night, I felt as though the words were bursting from my soul.  Indeed, the Lord had provided the faith and grace I needed to walk through that dark valley.


3. Being in choir.  REALLY wish I could have a memory session with so many friends who have moved away about the zany shenanagins that went on under Chip's leadership. . . often due to his leading.  He never ceased to crack me up with his careful use of words when we were singing TERRIBLY (Chip was so talented, and really had to deal with quite a ragtag choir at times!).  If someone slipped in without their binder of music, and just tried to look off someone else, Chip would berate them with the comment "I hate sharing!" Hahahaha!!!  We all loved it when Chip would get off track and start telling stories or reading limmericks or dancing with his wife.  It was flattering to be the one he teased or praised or welcomed back after a time away from rehearsals.  I loved it when he would call me to ask me to read Scripture or light the Advent candle in an upcoming service -- I have one such voicemail saved on my phone from recent months in which Chip cheerfully told me to call him at home, since he was home from the hospital, but felt like he'd been run over by a train.  Wow.  LOVE that guy.  The other night I told Josh I wished so bad to have back one of those Wednesday nights of rehearsal just to experience it again.


4. When my grandmother died, I e-mailed Chip to tell him we'd have to miss the Christmas communion service because we were driving to her funeral.  His e-mail reply was precious, and the fitting words have remained with me all this time "May Christ be your portion".


5. Chip's cap -- somehow Chip lost his scholar cap that he wore for every graduation and convocation service on campus.  And for several years, I was in the process of getting him a new one.  SOMEHOW every time one came in, it would not fit.  Too big, too small, yada yada.  He would borrow his daughter Clara's high school mortarboard to use in the meantime, or we'd lend him one of the extra rental caps with pink tassels.  Sometimes he'd try to remove the little year charm attached to the tassel, sometimes he'd just leave it there.  Oh my.  How did we NEVER take care of that cap situation?  Not that he seemed to mind too much!  It was all a big joke, always one more hurdle to jump over in our path to finding a cap that fit!  


6. Fast e-mailer -- in recent years and months when Chip was going to the clinic or in the hospital frequently, you could count on his e-mail replies coming in about 90 seconds.  I must say, I really appreciate that sort of speed.  I found an old e-mail in which he must have responded to me in record time because I said to him "Wow, that was the world's fastest reply."  I can only imagine the scores of people who have received answers from Chip via e-mail in this fashion.


7. Singing and playing -- love this video of Chip and Doris singing love songs together last year at our church's Valentine talent show.  Not only is it cute and funny, it shows a bit of his musical talent.


Thanks for walking down memory lane with me a little.  If you have a good Chip memory to share, please post it here!  I'd love to hear it! 

Praying for the Stams

This is Chip Stam -- someone very dear to our family.  Over 4 years ago, He roped us into singing in the choir at Clifton before we were even members, and became one of our very favorite people at our new church -- or even in the world! 


Chip has had cancer since the summer of 2007.  I will never forget that week of VBS when his Doris suddenly had to step away from teaching her class (Josh and I took it over) because of Chip's diagnosis and hospitalization.  I have never witnessed someone suffering first hand like this, for so long, with such true strength from Christ.  Who could forget Chip's antics?  He wore a back brace for a time, and would keep time in choir practice with the velcro straps -- I can see him now,  "rip-ripping" it and stomping his brown Crocs in beat to the music.  I remember Chip coming into the bookstore while I was working to inquire about a piece of music or something and while standing and talking to me, handing me handfuls of his hair to throw away for him that he was losing to chemo.  And I'm sure we cracked up about it! 

Every person who has known Chip would say he is one in a million.  So upbeat, so joyful, so gifted.  My life has TRULY changed from knowing him, and being in the services where he led the music.  We love Chip, and our hearts break to think of him being taken from us.  I pray for him and his family every night when I put Susie to bed -- that the Lord would give Susie a good night's sleep, and that he would also give Chip and Doris and Clara a good night's sleep; to be able to lie down and trust God and rest.  I do not know how many more days Chip has before he will enter the TRUE rest, and be taken home to his eternal reward, but for his family I continue to pray. 

I could never summarize all that Chip has meant to us, but I needed to write about him, because he is so present on my heart.  I pray that the Lord will be a gentle Shepherd and carry him and his family forever.

Good Friday to Easter Sunday

All dressed for church on Easter Sunday

I had such a great time making this past week a celebration with Susie, and have collected lots of ideas for next year!  Here's what we did, and what I'm planning to do next year:

Good Friday -- we ended up spending this day away from home for the most part because of what we thought was an emergency with the baby I'm carrying (turns out he's just fine), so we didn't get to the Easter mountain until dinnertime, but Susie and I talked about Jesus dying on the cross and then put him inside the mountain and put the rock over the opening.  I taught her the song "Easter Friday" from Emu Music that she just loved.  We must have sung it 50 times.  I sang the first two lines with a sad face, and covered my eyes, rubbing them when I sang the word "cried", and then spread out my hands slowly on the line "Sunday morning what a surPRISE", which always made her get really excited!  She requested we sing this song all weekend, calling it "Jesus sad" or "Easter". We also went swimming Friday night -- I tried to have some fun and special outings during this time to really make it special.


Saturday -- our church participates in the Easter parade that takes place on Frankfort Avenue, where Clifton Baptist is located.  Susie and I showed up to walk in the parade, but bad weather (and potential thunderstorms and hail) forced us to pull our float to keep the kids safe.  Back at the church parking lot, we passed out candy to parade watchers and watched the parade ourselves.  Other than re-reading our Easter books and checking to see if Jesus was still in the tomb on Saturday, we didn't do anything really original.  I wanted to make Resurrection cookies, but we attended a birthday party, and by the time Susie got a bath, the day was done.  I'm sure she'll appreciate doing the cookies more next year!


Sunday -- I hung a banner in the dining area that said "Jesus is Alive" and put Jesus outside the mountain with the stone rolled away before Susie got up.  I also set out a basket with a couple pieces of candy and two Christian Focus board books.  I let her eat some M&Ms pre-breakfast while we read them . . . may not have been wise. :)  We ended up with a little bit of spare time that morning (probably because I didn't fix a big meal), so Susie and I turned on her Gettys CD and had fun dancing in the living room.  I'm really glad that happened, because it certainly communicated to her "celebration".  After church, we went out to eat with some friends, and Susie had a really late nap.  When she woke up, we had a small egg hunt for her in the living room (downpour outside all day!).  She ate lots more candies that way, but amazingly still went to bed happily last night!

For next year, I want to do a little more decorating for Easter -- maybe with a special tablecloth, table settings or something.  I feel like decorating communicates celebration to kids -- and we decorate a ton for Christmas! Along with this, I would like to do an Easter tree (with a white branch) that we can decorate all week (or during Lent, maybe) by finding eggs with the decor hidden inside.  I have some things that I collected this year that may work for that next year.  This would be an adaptation to doing Resurrection eggs. I'm also hoping to do the Resurrection cookies (that you bake overnight Saturday and they are hollow inside when you bite them) next year.  The last thing that I feel like I may have dropped the ball on is making an Easter dinner.  We just had such a busy week and weekend, and ended up eating out (which was great!), but I want to be more intentional next year so we could invite people over and maybe start a tradition with our meal even! 


Here are some great ideas from GirlTalk blog for next year as well!

More Holy Week activities

**Updated**

Tuesday -- this is in no way original, but we colored eggs.  I debated back and forth about this activity, but am really glad I chose to do it.  Coloring eggs usually sort of falls in line with celebrating the "American" version of Easter, and not actually anything very holy, but I decided it's time we redeem this this activity!  And since we love to eat boiled eggs (Susie starting asking for a taste from the time I pulled them out of the fridge), I thought it would be a yummy healthy thing for us to eat all week.

In future years, I plan to talk about the colors having meaning and so forth, but for Susie being so small, I left it at asking her who made the eggies (she answered correctly -- God did), and talking about how the yellow was like the sun all big and bright (which is from her Baby-Hug-a-Bible) and just keeping her from sucking on the colored eggs and spilling it all over the kitchen.  I also intended on getting some stickers to decorate the eggs, and I may still do this later this week.  One big craft project in an evening is plenty for a toddler who is not yet two!

Wednesday -- tonight I was going to make our Easter mountain and take Susie swimming, but all our plans got derailed.  Josh made plans with a friend, I ended up babysitting, and the pool was closed.  SO, we did not have any big projects or fun outings, but I did turn on an Easter song for Susie and her friend Charis to dance to: "Christ Has Risen" by the Gettys (from their CD "Songs Jesus Said").  I had planned to teach them  "Easter Friday" from Emu music, which I had great expressions and motions for, but when I opened the CD case, the CD was gone!  Talk about things not going according to plan. :)  The girls enjoyed the Getty's song, though, and we danced to it over and over.  For dinner I cut out cross shapes into our garlic bread, and let Charis and Susie snack on the cut outs while they waited for supper. Before bed, I read Susie this book, which is a good simple story of the passion week (from the triumphal entry all the way to Christ meeting his disciples in the upper room after his resurrection).

Thursday -- I made an "Easter Mountain" out of a simple recipe for homemade playdough this morning and Susie and I decorated it this afternoon.  The idea for this comes from Noel Piper's book Treasuring God in Our Traditions.  You can use the setting all week to act out what Jesus does during the Passion week, but I thought it was most important to have it done by Thursday.  We left Jesus out in the garden to pray (I made the garden out of free Easter grass from CVS and rocks and flowers we found outside).  On Friday, we will put Jesus on the cross, and then in the tomb in the mountain.  On Saturday, we check and see that he is still there and then on Sunday, we put him on top of the mountain, victorious over death!

Adding grass around the mountain (it bakes for 4 hours first)

Coloring the picture of Jesus I copied from her book

Our Easter mountain centerpiece

I am really simplifying the explanation and description of these events for Susie, but am encouraged to see as a whole her vocabulary pick up terms we've been talking about all week.  She recognizes a cross, and of course, Jesus.  She has picked up on how Jesus' friends were "sad" when he died -- though she of course does not understand that. I think if I were home with her more than I am, we'd be able to retell and refresh the lessons and books over and over, but I know there are still many years to come!

Holy Week Actvities

I really wanted to do some things each day this week to make Holy Week special.  I feel like Susie is old enough to enjoy some special activities and begin to understand parts of Jesus death and resurrection (and I mean BARELY understand SMALL parts).  So far, this is what we have done:

Sunday -- I pulled out Susie's toy lambs.  She got one last year for Easter and and one this year (a little early).  I put them in a springy bucket with her 2 Easter books from last year (board books).  I figured they could be special toys and books we pull out only during this time of year to enjoy.  As the years go on, we will add to the collection.  

Monday -- pumpkin pancakes for breakfast (I just wanted to make them, even though I realize pumpkin is not very springy!).  I had picked up a set of little Easter cookie cutters at Jo-Ann's a while back with a $5 off coupon (making them like 80 cents!) and used the cross one to cut out the centers of the pancakes.  Susie played with the rest of the springy cookie cutters while I cooked, but I was thinking in future years, she can help me do the cut outs.

 At supper, I gave her cheese cut into cross shapes (again with the cookie cutter), a grape tomato for the rock by the tomb, and baby carrots cut into slices for the thorns.  I showed her the plate and told her about the shapes and what they were for (in VERY elementary terms), and said "This cross is like 'On the cross He took my sin'" which of course made her very excited to sing the Gospel song, so we did about 50 times.  

Diving into the food -- I could not grab the camera fast enough

As we finished eating, I read to her the page about Jesus' death and resurrection from her book God is Great by Carolyn Larson (which I love), and showed her how in the picture there was a cross, and stone, like on her plate.  She loved how Jesus was standing -- she said "Jesus HI!"  We shouted "Jesus is alive, YAAAAAAAY" a whole bunch of times.  She was very excited!  

I love this book -- what a great toddler storybook!

The very cute excited applause about Jesus being alive!

Playing in the Rain

Squishing mud under the boots

Susie is so muddy because she took a few spills!

I let Susie and her friend go out to play in the rain yesterday, since they both had rain boots.  Turns out the boots didn't make much difference for Sus, since she fell in the deep puddles several times, causing the muddy water to flow right down into her new "meow" boots. Haha!!  She's my kind of kid.  STOMP! SPLASH! Dig, dig, dig.  There was a HUGE dead bee on our patio yesterday morning, about which Susie kept commenting "bee fall down!!"  It was pretty awesome to make the bee float in the water and pour more water over him.

Someone commented on this picture that it reminded them of what they did as a kid.  That warms my heart so much, because I too, have these messy outdoor memories, and I'm so thankful that Susie isn't missing out on that, living in a big city.  Thank you, Lord, for giving us a bit of outdoor space at our humble apartment!

First Popsicle

Tonight was a lovely spring evening, and after our walk, Susie and I enjoyed some Edy's strawberry bars outside.  It was Susie's first Popsicle. . . mmmmm!

Yesterday Josh took her to the library, and I suggested he get her some more Curious George books -- whatever they had (our library tends to have them all checked out).  He got Curious George Rides a Bike and said "but it's WAY too long for her."  I had the impression that he'd tried reading it at the library or something, and she didn't want to sit for it.  Nope!  She sat and listened to the almost 50 page book the FIRST time I read it to her yesterday afternoon!  And we've read it about ten times since!  This is one I'm thinking we're going to need to find in hardback to keep.  So thankful my girlie likes to read!

Linking up to Simply Modern Mom.

My Beach Girlie

Ahhh. . .

Just returned from 4 great days at the beach.  So thankful for that time of relaxation!  Here is one of my favorite pictures of Susie playing in the sand.

A friend of mine sent me this link, saying the pictures of Susie playing in the sand reminded her of this Mary Cassatt painting.  I just love it!

When children are sick

Everywhere I turn I am hearing about friends whose kiddos have come down with this, that and the other.  One family at my church had a child with chicken pox.  Another had scarlet fever!  Additionally, I know of multiple families whose children have had the flu or a virus more than once, or strep or ear infections, etc.

Every mom (and probably dad) knows how pitiful it is when their children are sick, especially when they are up at night, and just appear to be plain miserable.  Our hearts break for them, wishing we could take away the sickies with a magic wand.

I realized today that I am so thankful that when Susie is sick (as she was through the night last night), I care for her without any sort of TRUE FEAR that she won't recover.  I may let myself worry a little, and certainly feel distressed in the middle of things, but I do expect her to get better, even if it takes time.  I remember reading once about a mother who had adopted several children with AIDS and other horrible diseases.  She spoke about the horror of holding your child while she was ill, and not knowing if it would truly be all right.  She called on western mothers with generally healthy children to pray for the faith of the parents of these severely sick children, that they would trust in God's sovereignty and give them the grace they needed to walk down that terrible road.  

Let our children's sicknesses (and our own) be a reminder to pray for those who suffer continually, sometimes without hope of recovery. 

Dancing with Susie

I chose this picture as a glimpse into motherhood this week because I loved so much this sweet time I had with Susie.  We were dancing to the Blue Grass "moo-kiss" (as she calls it) at a Maple Sugar Festival this weekend.  One reason I loved it was that I actually had the energy to hold her and dance around and twirl and sing along to the songs, even though I've been starting to get rather tired with this pregnancy.  We hit the wet, muddy dance floor 3 separate times during our visit to the festival, and she loved it as much as I did -- if not more!  Love it that we still have Mommy and Susie times that are just for the two of us.

Love my little lumberjack girlie in her ziplock-baggie-under-Robeez shoes.

Running in from the rain

Tonight while I was in class it began to rain really hard, and there was just no way to avoid tramping through it quite a bit.  Susie and I had bags of stuff to carry from our afternoon on campus, and though my friend who gave us a ride kindly pulled up to pick us up, we still got drenched.  I love how Susie silently bore getting pelted by the shower and then had this deer in the headlights look on her face when we got home!

She was precious as I peeled off her wet layers and stuffed her in fluffy, dry jammies for bed.  I wonder if her hair will be all the way dry in the morning?
:)

Boy Stuff I've Made

Two super awesome blogs that I enjoy reading (MADE and Made by Rae) are featuring a WHOLE month of stuff just for boys.  Many sewing projects and craft blogs are centered around girls, and I have really appreciated all the fun inspiration I've found reading these blogs as well as their archives from last year.  I am a beginner in sewing, to say the least, but in honor of "For the Boy" month, I've worked on a few boy projects for my nephews and my baby-on-the-way.

Here are the pictures of what I've made.  PLEASE keep in mind, I am a beginning sewer. . . which you can tell by my lovely stitchery. :)

 This was my first project -- actually, I only finished it in honor of "For the Boy" month.  I had already done most of the owl.  This was for my nephew Graham, and it's a cheat, because I just used the iron-on stuff (I made it before I got my sewing machine).

 Tie up-cycled from one of my husband's ties (he approved it first!).  It's for a gift, but I will probably make more.  The tutorial on how to make them is right here.  Taken from the archives of last year's "For the Boy" month.

 Drool bib for my baby boy, who is on the way.  I would not give it away because of how poorly it is sewn, but if he's just going to spit up on it, oh well. :)  I was very excited about the THOUGHT behind this bib, but it was really just one major oops after another (not sure if you can tell that there is gingham UNDER the white elephant -- that'd be my first mistake.  Ironed the wrong side down. . . and it went downhill from there).

My SIL Kari found out she is expecting her 3rd boy.  Needless to say, she's well equipped in boy clothes and gear, but to celebrate his special status, I made him a little number bib. 

Finally a picture of Susie playing with her older cousin Max this weekend.  He's not quite 2 years older than her, and she totally thinks he's awesome.  I took them outside for a bit of fresh (and COLD) air and sunshine to run around.  I had them running races down to the shed and back, which of course was just an excuse to make them run fast.  Sus was nonplussed by her losses and kept running after him anyway. :)  I love how Max has that big stick in his hand here. :)  Boys.

I feel like Susie is the kind of little girl who could definitely enjoy having a little brother to play with!

Al Mohler on Bookstores

I really hope Dr. Mohler is right.  I would miss bookstores so very much. . .

Read his article here.  I work for the "excellent store on our campus" that he mentions -- thanks, sir. :)

This quote stuck out to me as especially true: “If you remove books from our towns and villages and malls, there will be less opportunity for the serendipitous discovery of books. And that will make it tougher to sell books.”

In the past, I worked for a store that recently went out of business, which was a tragedy for the community it had served for years.  The community probably does not realize what a loss it has sustained. . . until they notice that their kids will now only have the option to peruse books at WalMart. . . in between grocery and school clothes shopping.  I imagine that perusal will not be a lengthy one.

Do you agree Dr. Mohler?  Do you love to handle books before you buy them?  Do you shop for books in a real brick and mortar store?  Support the future of your community and the future of BOOKS by shopping for them locally!

Scenes from Valentine's Day

We celebrated V-day on Saturday with heart-shaped pancakes for breakfast, cards, presents for Susie, and a VERY fun date night for Josh and I -- eating at Havana Rhumba (YUMMY Cuban restaurant), a little Target (fun) shopping and Pie Kitchen for dessert.  Thankful for our friends from our small group at church who babysat (for free!) so we could go out!

So today was not a huge celebration day (we both worked), but there was still some fun involved.  Here are some pics to outline our Valentine's Day:

1. Fetal echo on our little guy who is growing  and making me grow!  I'm 25 weeks, and he's got a nice normal heart as far as we can tell.  I watched his heart on the ultrasound monitor for almost an hour (the total U/S was longer than an hour), but of course have no pictures of that process.  Here's me right before we left.

Please click on this picture -- I look less chubby when the photo is enlarged.

2. Came home from work to find these framed family pictures on the wall!  What a great Valentine's surprise!  I'd bought the frames and put in pictures a while back, but I'm bad at arranging, and Josh is sort of a perfectionist, so I knew I'd just have to wait for him to have at it.  The Valentine decor was made by me and Sus last week -- she colored the hearts hanging from the light fixture over our table. :)

3. Valentine cards and presents in the mail!  I've been hanging Susie's cards over her bed -- I started this tradition last year, and now I think it's going to be our thing.

4. It was WARM enough to play outside, so as soon as dinner was over, Sus and I headed out.  Our Chinese neighbor met us on the steps and said "Oh, Susie, you have wonnerful hair!"  I think it was the strawberry clips that won him over. :)  Our apartment complex has a big pebble pit where it once housed a swimming pool and Susie loves to play in it.  It's a somewhat cleaner version of a sandbox.

5. Washed the cups in the sink when we came back in.  Susie was soaked and so was the bathroom floor, but WOW was that entertaining.  She "washed" them for 30-45 minutes while I cleaned the tub.  Now that she's big enough to kneel on a chair, this will be a frequent activity.

6. Snuggles, kisses and giggles from my little Bizzy Boo -- she's a pretty sweet Valentine, since I didn't get to see my man much today!  When looking at this picture, she noticed her belly was showing (which she calls "boody") -- haha! 

This is her "cheese" smile

 And, hey this holiday isn't quite over yet!  Josh just texted to say he's bringing home milkshakes!