Thursday, June 18, 2009
Thoughts on Motherhood
18 days into my journey as a mother, I'm loving and appreciating this new role more than I ever thought possible. I'm also more overwhelmed than I ever thought possible. It certainly is a learning game -- I would describe it as starting a new career where you have to learn to do everything the job requires without very much (or mixed) instruction. You obviously can't learn a new job all at once -- it takes a while, and you learn things bit by bit. Here are a few things I have learned, or have been surprised to discover:
1. I do not mind late night feedings. My precious Susan is so wonderful to spend that sweet time with! I do love it that she needs me, and that it's just her and me at that time. I do love it when she goes right back to sleep, too. :)
2. God's design for motherhood is amazing. I am continually surprised by the instincts that have kicked in -- in just a matter of days. I have never been a huge baby person, and everyone assured me it would be different when it was MY baby. They were right! I am humbled to see the way God has designed me.
3. We're taking one day at a time. . . well, it's more like one feeding or nap at a time. I think I could describe my parenting these past 2 weeks as a form of Flexible Attachment Scheduling. :) It's really true that each family has to figure out what works for THEIR child, and their lives together! What a joy to discover, though!
4. The Lord answers the prayer of His child when she prays for wisdom. The other night I was afraid that I was not producing enough milk for Susie (she just seemed really hungry all the time for a couple days, and I was feeding her a lot, but had nothing left!), and we had one particularly difficult evening when I was crying harder than she was. :*) Hormones, grieving for my mom, and sleep-deprivation played into these tears, but as I calmed down, I asked the Lord to give me wisdom -- or show me a good source for wisdom. He graciously provided my cousin Corrie to give me some input on nursing, and several other encouraging people (including my kind husband!) to help me navigate those rocky days. James does say that if we lack wisdom, to ask God for it! THANK goodness!
5. Josh and I are like kids at Christmas with that cute baby! I love sharing the fun with him. We both think she is utterly adorable, and that she already has a fun personality. We're grabbing the camera every 2 seconds -- I see now why there are only 2 million MORE pictures of my brother than there are of me. 2 adults with one baby to watch -- that means there is always one set of hands to be snapping away. :)