Failing for the Glory of God

I just polished off the second of Dr. Helen Roseveare's autobiographical books, and the message in He Gave Us a Valley hit my heart like a ton of bricks. Let me explain.

Dr. Roseveare worked for 20 tumultuous years in the Congo, through the frightening time of independence and the Simba uprising. Beside the violence and near death experience of that time, she sacrificially used her doctoring to not only minister to the poverty stricken people of the jungle, but also to train young men and women to do medical work and become midwives, traveling far and wide with the gospel. For 20 years, she sought for the government to recognize their medical college, pouring her own funds into the day to day expenses and doggedly filing paperwork, visiting dignitaries, and preparing the school and students for inspection. At long last, the government recognized the school, gave their stamp of approval on the diplomas, and arranged for subsidizing scholarships for 2nd and 3rd year students. At this moment of triumph, when Dr. Roseveare prepared to retire from jungle living and humbly hand her ministry over to younger doctors, she met with total rejection and humiliation.

Her students turned against her. Those she loved as sons, championed for, and poured her life and resources into refused to sign for the pocket money they were being given out of the scholarship money. It was not enough, they insisted. They accused her of stealing from the ministry for months. She was put on trial, and had to bear to hear those sons accuse her spitefully, and knowing her own innocence was not balm enough for a soul enduring such wounds. She resigned from the school so that others might work out the strike (the students refused to do their volunteer work in the wards) and come to an agreement. She ended her time serving in Christ's name in the Congo, wondering if it was worthwhile.

Only after she turned away, like Jonah tossed from the storm-driven ship, was she able to consider what the Lord was saying to her. "'These are not your sufferings: they are Mine. All I ask of you is the loan of your body. . . You went home and told everyone that I was sufficient. Isn't that true now, in today's circumstances?'

"I tried to say: 'But of course, Lord. You know it's true.'

"'No' He quietly rebuked me. 'No. You no longer want Jesus only, but Jesus plus. . . plus respect, popularity, public opinion, success and pride. You wanted to go out with all the trumpets blaring. . . You wanted to feel needed and respected. You wanted the other missionaries to be worried about how ever they'll carry on after you've gone. You'd like letters when you got home to tell you how much they realize they owe to you, how much they miss you. All this and more. Jesus plus . . No, you can't have it. Either it must be 'Jesus Only' or you'll find you've no Jesus. You'll substitute Helen Roseveare.'"

Doesn't that ring a bell in your heart? I was pointedly reminded of the end of my teaching internship when one particular class chanted "Down with Miss B" -- even the wonderful Christian kids that I'd loved -- because I didn't give extra credit for classroom behavior to a student who'd threatened to kill me. I was totally innocent, and right. And it was so painful to have them all turn on me so. I can still feel twinges of that if I call up those memories -- how much I wanted good for those kids, and how much evil they returned me. Why does it hurt so much? My body is just on loan from the Lamb Who was led to the slaughter. Any suffering endured while living in obedience to Christ is for His glory, and part of His good plan.

Consider the lesson Dr. Roseveare learned when she faced what felt like complete failure. What else do you want in addition to Jesus? Are you able to fail in all your strivings -- for the glory of God? Can you say, at a time of rejection, that Christ is sufficient? Perhaps you look back, as I can, to a twinging hurt from the past -- will you take that, as from the Father's hand, a "failure" for your good and His glory?

A Titus 2 Talk

I have this friend at my church who is also named Gretchen, and I really really like and admire her. She is the mom of 5 boys, and has an engaging personality -- friendly, expressive, relaxed and talkative. Tonight I got to hang out with her for a little while over a cup of iced coffee while Josh hung out with her boys (her husband is traveling in central Asia). I feel like this brief evening was an answer to prayer I'd had on my heart and lips for several years now -- for an older friend who would encourage me in the gospel and practically live out Titus 2 (the older women teaching the younger) in my life.

Gretchen encouraged me to love my husband -- to delight in who he is and how God is growing and using him. She encouraged me to be content in my circumstances, serving through Josh's school years as the breadwinner so that down the road I can be at home with children. She shared her own experiences of coming to realize how small she was and how big God was and that He loved her anyway, and how that actually changes your everyday life! We discussed keeping our homes, not over-organizing our husband's closets or pridefully obsessing over a clean house so that we look good in the eyes of our friends. Gretchen said "you have to find the balance between 'how much do I need to be clean and organized to serve my family?' and 'how much is this organizing is just to serve myself?'" I was so refreshed by her honesty and wisdom.

All of this was discussed in perhaps an hour's time. There was no program, no big to-do. It was simply life-on-life relationship, Christ's love our bond.

Friends, I share this to encourage you, as young women, to seek out the wisdom of an older friend! In some churches, these women are more plentiful than the younger women are, and you have a plethora to choose from. In others (like mine), the elder's wives are in high demand, and you need to be considerate and content with the time you can spend together.

Most everyone who reads this knows a younger woman who would benefit from your friendship, if you took some time here and there to just ask her to hang out and share your life with her. This is being the body of Christ together!

Caitlin's Reading List

This is Caitlin. She is my new little sister from the junior high youth group. She's actually the big sister to 5 younger brothers and sisters, so I figure she needs a big sis -- so here I am. She is a HUGE reader. Every time I give her books, she gobbles them up! Her mom and dad told me she is quickly outreading them! Well, I imagine Caitlin will also outread me eventually, but while I can, I'll make her a summer reading list. Here you go:

1. The Penderwicks by Jeanne Birdsall. This is a GREAT summer reading story! I think you'll like all the sisters in it, as I did. Batty is so much like Claire, and you are rather Rosalind. It's a fun, sweet story.

2. The Fisherman's Lady by George MacDonald -- Beth Bloom suggested these to me, and they are excellent. Out of print, but I have them, if you'd like to borrow.

3. The Marquis' Secret by George MacDonald -- sequel to #2

4. The Miraculous Journey of Edward Tulane by Kate Dicamilo (light read, but outstanding story with strong redemptive themes).

5. To Kill a Mockingbird by Harper Lee. Your mom and dad can call this one, but I think it's just amazing, and that you'll really like it.

6. The Saturdays by Elizabeth Enright. I hope you haven't already read this. I love these stories so much! If you like it, read the rest of the Quartet: The Four-Story Mistake, Then There Were Five, Spiderweb for Two.

7. Don't Waste Your Life by John Piper. Again -- maybe your parents already had you read this, but if not, it's such a solid book and an inspiration.

8. Stepping Heavenward by Elizabeth Prentiss. Fiction, but written like a girl's diary as she grows up and shows how she wrestles with her faith, first to believe, then to begin to be sanctified as she becomes a young wife and mother.

Happy reading, Caitlin! Love you, little sis!

Bookish events

I've recently had some fun book-centered events, both at home and at the bookstore where I work. It began a couple weeks ago, with an evening of tea and reading Elisabeth Elliot excerpts with my friends, and fellow EE admirers Canaan and Annie. It was such a blessing and an encouragement to share this together, I'm not sure why we hadn't done so sooner!

Look at the spread -- isn't it amazing?? Annie's teacups, Canaan's strawberries and my scones with Devonshire clotted cream and lemon curd. Delightful!






The three of us in a self-timer shot. Look at the pile of books that await!

















Annie reads to us from Keep a Quiet Heart.













Here are some shots from our Prince Caspian event this morning. We read 2 parts of Prince Caspian (where Lucy hopes for the trees to awake) and then made tree people by tracing our hands on brown paper for the trunk and adding faces and decorations. Here Lydia and I work on her funny tree with the long long limbs. I traced her fingers to go off the end of the page so the tree's branches were long and skinny and she thought they were funny.














This is another Lydia, who was dressed like Queen Lucy for the occasion. I love how well these kids around here can read! They must grow up in reading homes (with Dad in Seminary, I'd imagine so!).



















Providence's smile got tired before the camera got finished, but don't you love her tree-girl? She had a mommy who could draw faces! At least Providence's tree has a happy face!

















This is Hannah, our one teenage attendee. I'm glad she got into the spirit! She and I were the only ones who had seen the movie, so we had lots to share.

Summer Book Club

I have this little red journal that I bought at the Guggenheim in which I've listed 100 things I want to do in my life. I wrote this list some years back, and mostly they are rather surface things, like having high tea wearing a hat. Some are a bit more lofty, and others are more achievable. One of them is being in a book club, and I'm just about ready to cross it off the list.

My friends Megan and Heather from church invited me to join their summer book club, and as a founding member I joined them in deciding what we'd read, and the length of time we'd spend reading them. We chose the best books from some of our favorite authors, in different genres. Here's what we came up with:

1. Mansfield Park by Jane Austen

2. Great Expectations by Charles Dickens

3. Hamlet by Shakespeare

4. Sherlock Holmes short story collection

5. In My Father's House by Corrie Ten Boom

I'm halfway through Mansfield Park right now, and eagerly anticipating our first discussion -- we're having breakfast at Blue Dog Bakery, which is one of my favorite local places here. Strong Illy coffee, artesian breads, and talking books with my dear sisters in Christ -- sounds like a great summer to me!

Midnight Prince Caspian Viewing

A few months back when I had the junior high girls over for a slumber party, I mentioned to them how fun it would be to go see Prince Caspian together -- which played out into an 18 person group from our church at the midnight showing! Watching a highly-anticipated movie with a large, fun group enhances the experience at least 10-fold. Here are my thoughts on the show (keep in mind, I have only just returned, and the coffee hasn't worn off, so forgive any unclear ramblings):

• 
  
• Characters: Lucy was just perfect. Her steady faith in Aslan's wisdom and power, unselfish motives and delight in Aslan himself were utterly true to the stories as well as a refreshing respite from the doubts and feuding of Peter and Caspian. Georgie Henley, who plays Lucy is just right -- age, poise and sweetness of temper. Edmund is also terrific. He does a great job of being a strong understated character in this movie -- solid, loyal and brave (Ed is my favorite of the Pevensies, which makes me excited for Dawn Treader). Susan's character was changed most -- from being someone who "hated killing things" in the book, to a warrioress leading the archers in battle. Aside from this derivation (which made her a much better character than she is in the book, to my opinion), the worst of it is that she has this developed sexuality. She and Caspian keep exchanging meaningful glances and the movie ends with a cheesy quip from Susan "it wouldn't have worked between us anyway". The teens viewing this movie joined me in the wholehearted opinion that the suggested romance nearly ruined the movie. It's just dumb. Other than that, Susan was much more like later Narnian girls, like Jill or Aravis, whom I always preferred. Peter was sort of a wash. Perhaps they tried hard to show how he was "coming of age", but I didn't like how he was portrayed as having no faith in Aslan, or how he bickers with Caspian throughout, but his fight with Miraz is fantastic, as well as other fighting scenes. By the end, Peter is mended and back to his wise and mature self. Perhaps the biggest disappointment is Caspian himself. The movie didn't do enough to endear you to the Prince, and his acting was quite inferior to the other children in the movie. I thought he was rather hunchy and gritted-teethy, rattling off revengeful declarations rather like the Spaniard in "The Princess Bride". Perhaps they'll use someone else in Dawn Treader.
  
• Plot: A lot of talk was made of the derivations from the book, but I found them to be really true to the stories. Strict constructionists may disagree, but PC was not really written with the modern screenplay in mind, so elevating the battle scenes and intensifying other parts were actually rather well done. I eluded to the Caspian/Susan romance which was by far the silliest change, and also the heavy emphasis on the feud between Peter and Caspian. This leads to a lot of accusations and heated scenes that sort of drag the movie down a bit. Not to say the plot was not excellent -- it really was. And it loosely follows the exact layout of the story: Intro of Pevensies and problem, battles for the throne, Aslan's rescue and leaving through the doorway. One part I thought improved was the scene where the werewolf and the hag are brought by Nikabrik to propose bringing back the White Witch. In the movie, she actually is seen, just about ready to return, while Peter, Lucy, Edmund and Trumpkin fight off the vermin. You see that Caspian is tempted to reach to her, and Edmund shatters the ice that holds the Witch. It's very well done.
• Theology: The main derivations of theology were mainly seen in a couple statements by Aslan. They are minor but significant (and likely only caught by someone who has practically memorized Aslan's statements). He tells Lucy that as she grows, he grows, which is just slightly off, but implies something rather postmodern about Lucy's faith (being what she makes it). He also tells Lucy that they don't know what would have happened if she would obeyed right away, which is the largest change in Aslan's character, who, in the books, is omniscient and knows all the possibilities of other worlds and actions.

It was a great movie. I certainly plan on watching it again -- perhaps this weekend!

Anna's Summer Reading

Today is my sister Anna's birthday, and she requested a summer reading list as well. Anna is 2 years younger than me (we won't say how old she's turning, but it's still younger than me!), married and a great nurse (with lots of patience -- hee hee). Since we shared so much the same schooling experience, I know she loves reading about as much as I do.

Anna, I thought I would give you a slightly shorter list than Emily, since I know with work and everything, you will have a bit less time for reading than she. Here are some great books I hope you enjoy! Happy Reading!

1. Digging Ditches by Helen Roseveare This is another part of Dr. Roseveare's autobiography, telling her amazing stories as an medical missionary.

2. Mansfield Park by Jane Austen. I'm reading this right now, and I thought you might like to join me!

3. The Hiding Place by Corrie Ten Boom. I'm not sure if you've already read this or not, but even if so, I thought you might like a refresher before reading:

4. Tramp for the Lord by Corrie Ten Boom. This is a fascinating book about Corrie's travels all over the world and how in her fragile old age,the Lord answered her prayers and provided for her over and over keeping her safe and whole, and enabling her to tell her story over and over. This is a woman who survived the Holocaust! I know for a fact that the library at Calvary has like 97 copies of this book.

5. The Peacemaker by Ken Sande. I'm having Emily read the student edition of this one, hoping that she would share it with Abby, too. I thought you guys might like to read it together!

6. The Princess and the Goblin by George MacDonald. This is your George MacDonald to read. MacDonald is the author that influenced C.S. Lewis the most, and he is just an amazing storyteller. If you like it, there is a sequel, The Princess and Curdie.

7.The Screwtape Letters by C.S. Lewis. I hope I'm not giving you a bunch of books you've already read, but I know you will really like this one. The letters from the demon Wormwood to his uncle Screwtape are so clever, so humorous (at times) and so true to life! This book is quite original, and well done as only Lewis can do!

Emily's Summer Reading

Here's the summer reading list I made for my dear sister Emily, who celebrated her 19th birthday yesterday! I have been making her summer reading lists for years.

Happy Birthday, Emma. Here are the good books I picked for you to read this summer:

1. The Peacemaker Student Edition by Ken Sande. I think this will be a great help to you as live out your counseling degree. :)

2. The Story of the Treasure Seekers by E. Nesbit. I have been raving. Now it's time for you to read it!

3. The Wouldbegoods by E. Nesbit. I'm so sure you will love the first one, you simply MUST read the hilarious sequel.

4. The New Treasure Seekers by E. Nesbit. You just won't be able to stop once you've read the first two.

5. The Cross-Centered Life by C.J. Mahaney. It's short, but it's incredibly good. I pray this book will be a breath of fresh air, as it was to me. Sweet, liberating, and solid.

6. The Gray Wolf and Other Stories by George MacDonald. I know how much you love George MacDonald and Woofs.

7. The Black Cauldron by Lloyd Alexander. This is the first in a series of The Chronicles of Prydain. Dr. Orrick (who was one of Emily's favorite teachers this semester) and his daughter were in the bookstore the other day and they recommended these to me.

8. The Book of Three by Lloyd Alexander. This is the sequel to Black Cauldron.

9. Living Faith by Helen Roseveare. This is an autobiography by a woman who was a medical missionary in Africa for decades. I think you'll really like her. She's so readable.

10. The Penderwicks on Gardam Street. I put this one on here because I know you were already planning to read it. I am too!

Love you, Em!

Living Out Biblical Manhood -- My Cousin Steve

This is my cousin, Steve Hill, or at least, the way I remember him from my childhood. In my huge Benzing family of 30+ cousins and 30+ second cousins, Steve ranks up there as a universal favorite for everyone. My whole life I have known Steve to be a kind and gentle guy, easy to talk with. His soft-spoken humor and friendly demeanor endears him to all who know him. Steve is the son of my dad's older sister, Aunt Pat. He and his wife Lorraine, have 4 children: Josh, Isaac, Joseph and Anna.

Steve came to Christ as a young child, and after attending a spiritual disciplines retreat in junior high, he increasingly committed his life to being sold out for Christ -- knowing Him and making Him known. During college, he worked with international students from around the world staying in London, where he was encouraged to press on in his faith, and grow and learn much. He still enjoys serving in Christ's name internationally, and recently took a missions trip with his oldest son to Costa Rica.

When I asked him what God had been teaching him lately, he replied "How important it is to prepare my children to live for Christ: to make Him the center of their life, to love unconditionally, to prepare for suffering, to make the most of every opportunity. I am not sure how well we are doing at this -- some days are much better than others and we have to take the long view on their discipleship." This seasoned dad had lots of great insight on investing in your children. Here is just the tip of the iceberg, some really great stuff I don't hear a lot of people saying:

"Understand that you are responsible for the education of your children. God will hold you accountable. Read the Bible to your children regularly. they will retain and recall so much that you read to them -- even years later. There will be constant attempts to crowd out this particular activity -- make it a priority (and try to make it interesting :)"

"Manage deliberately the transition from boy to man. I am in the midst of this and trying to properly manage transfer of responsibility and accountability."

"Control and preview the media that your children have access to. Be firm on avoiding evil here. Your kids will push early for more freedoms in this area, but once you are proven to be firm, they will also have this conviction. Take time to explain to your children why things are right and wrong. Commands that they cannot watch certain shows or wear certain clothes are empty rules and regulations without clear explanation. Take time to research this so you can systematically explain this to them from the Scriptures."

I really appreciated Steve's humble masculinity. He is a servant leader to his family. I asked him what advice he'd give to husbands out there, and here is a bit of what he gave me (I'm quoting again, because what he wrote was so good!):

"Be generous with your wealth, recognizing God's ownership. Have the right attitude towards money and possessions -- this is the downfall of so many. I would suggest reading Money, Possessions and Eternity by Randy Alcorn -- one of the best books on the right perspective on possessions and ownership that I have read, and will help provide principles for your family."

"Do not be lured into the passive 'silence of Adam'. There are times when your wife or children will want to go in a different direction that you feel uncomfortable with. If your still small voice gives you concern, speak up and work this out with your family. God will use you and your wife in different ways to have sensitivity to sin and His leading. Speaking your concerns is hard because of the potential conflict it may cause, but it is essential."

I now know Steve to not only be kind and gentle, but wise and godly, an example of Biblical Manhood living out loud in this modern era where such men are few and far between. Steve told me he was working to internalize his personal mission statement: "I want to be a servant of God for his purposes, and a servant of others in obedience to his call. I want to recognize that I am a steward of God for all the possessions, relationships, family and opportunities he has given me. I am a constant student of His Word and of the life and world He has created. I am a citizen of heaven and all that entails -- an ambassador for Christ, an alien and stranger on earth, a subject of the King and His kingdom, and a brother to my family in the body of Christ."

Thanks, Steve. You are a treasure to your family and all who are blessed to know you.

Because He Loves Me -- the Gospel and My Everyday Life, or "Taking the Gospel to the Dentist"

Elyse Fitzpatrick's new book, Because He Loves Me has been released, and is available for purchase in the bookstore where I work. I had an advanced manuscript of the book -- thanks to my beloved academic buyer -- so I'm about halfway through the book right now. It is great. The content is top-notch. Thouroughly steeped in Scripture, applicable and practical, Elyse writes to us on how the gospel transforms our everyday lives.

Which it does! Elyse uses the mundane example of being stuck in traffic to show how the gospel can invade and affect every aspect of our lives, no matter how minute. The driver can sit in their car, irritated by the traffic, angry at the drivers around them, feeling defeated and feeding their sin by stewing about it, or they can stop and consider the gospel. C.J. Mahaney would call it "preaching the gospel to yourself". Instead of thinking "Why do I have to wait in this stupid traffic?" the questions we should rightly ask are Why would God send his Son to die for me, Hiswretched enemy? or Why should I be a partaker of His never-dying love? Elyse writes: "the only answers to these questions is that God, who is rich in mercy has loved us with his great love and showered us with his grace!"

So I took this to heart today during my dentist appointment. I was dismayed to learn that my teeth were significantly decaying and I'd have to get further work done. I lay in the dentist chair, in a bit of pain, a bit discouraged, and just a touch frightened. Suddenly, the realization popped into my head that I had forgotten the gospel. So, as the dentist continued his work, I began to consider the blessings of the gospel. My decaying teeth reminded me of the decay of my body, my finite, temporary shell that bears the marks and repercussions of the fall -- death. And even though my body is all the time dying, death is not the final victor, for Christ has overcome and crushed death to death.

Elyse goes on to point out another vital connection between the gospel and the Christian's everyday life. Using Ephesians 4:32 as an example, she points out the imperatives in this verse (be kind, forgiving, etc.). Most believers notice those things and focus there -- I know I can tend to do that. But Elyse gives us a new pair of glasses to put on, which show this verse through the lens of the gospel. She says "can you see how the imperative 'Be kind, tenderhearted, forgiving' is firmly anchored in the indicative, 'you're forgiven in Christ'? This verse demonstrates a beautiful synergy that not only tells us what to do, but also plants within our souls the only motive that will empower God-pleasing compliance: what God has already done. We've already been forgiven in Christ. So many of us cavalierly gloss over what he's done and zero in on what we're to do, and that shift, though it might seems slight, makes all the difference in the world. Our obedience has it's origin in God's prior action and forgetting that truth results in self-righteousness, pride and despair."

Good book. On a completely superficial level, I will say that this book is also one of the most beautiful new books I've seen. Children's books often get this kind of beautiful artwork on the textured slipcover as well as illustrated header pages inside, but grown-up books rarely get this sort of treatment. Because of the universal applicability of the content, as well as the beauty of the book, I'm recommending this book as the #1 Mother's Day and graduation gift this year.

Elizabeth

Last night I found out that a remarkable woman that I knew, Mary Coffman, passed away suddenly. I knew Mary and her equally remarkable daughter Elizabeth from working at the Blue Kangaroo Bookstore. Mary and Elizabeth were much much more than customers, though. We shared a kind of friendship that C.S. Lewis refers to in The Four Loves : when you realize that someone else loves the same books you do and you think to yourself "I thought I was the only one!" Lewis tells a story about when he became friends with his neighbor Arthur in Surprised by Joy:

"I found Arthur sitting up in bed. On the table beside him lay a copy of Myths of the Norsemen.
"'Do you like that?' said I.
"'Do you like that?' said he.
"Next moment the book was in our hands, our heads were bent close together, we were pointing, quoting, talking - soon almost shouting - discovering in a torrent of questions that we liked not only the same thing, but the same parts of it and in the same way."

Even though I moved away, Elizabeth and I have still e-mailed about good books, or upcoming movies-made-from-books. We have come from American Girl to Narnia to Harry Potter to Edith Nesbit and George MacDonald. I have always loved how she was immediately willing to discuss a book! Even though Elizabeth is eleven, we have shared the bond of reading.

Last summer, when Mary and Elizabeth came to visit me, and we went out to eat at Lynn's Paradise Cafe (spending a good long time in "the world of swirl" as you might imagine). I was so intrigued to watch Mary lay good questions out on the table. We were all sharing what we hoped would come through in the final Harry Potter book, and when Elizabeth expressed an especially vengeful wish toward Malfoy, Mary gently returned a rather C.S. Lewis-ish response: "But Elizabeth, wouldn't you rather see him turn to good? A traitor may mend." (Edmund's remark to Eustace when he has just become un-dragoned in The Voyage of the Dawn Treader.) I was always so touched by Mary's friendship with her daughter. Elizabeth is indeed a unique and wonderful child -- one I am blessed to know, and hope to know more as she grows into a young woman.

Elizabeth -- you are in my thoughts and prayers!

In Honor of My Mentor

Tonight was our final event for the Pendergraph Women's Ministry on campus. I'm in charge of coordinating the food, and we decided to have a tea (to my delight!). The seminary graciously let us borrow this gorgeous tea service and glass teacups for 200. Along with a variety of tea sandwiches, cookies and scones (complete with clotted Devonshire cream and lemon curd) it made a lovely spread, as you can see by the pictures. I chose some of my favorite teas for the occasion -- PG Tips and Twinings -- and served them with cream, lemon, honey and sugar cubes.




The event was on women mentoring women, and each board member was in charge of decorating a table in honor of her mentor. I did mine in honor of DiAnne Humrichous, who was mentor in ministry to children. I've written about Miss DiAnne before -- she was wonderfully gifted. Her daughter Jill sent me these pictures to complement the layout. I put my Bible and a little lamp to highlight DiAnne's love for the Word. She memorized chapters and chapters of the Bible, and taught generations of children to do the same. I also put out a vase of roses -- her signature! My friend Jill even named her daughter Lauren Rose in honor of her mother, because DiAnne loved roses so much.




I was so blessed to be with so many godly women who love Christ supremely and serve Him with their lives. Here is a picture of my friend and helper, Rhonda, who worked as my assistant on the board this year. This sister has been a surprise new friend for me this year. I'm always in awe of who God brings into our lives to encourage our walk with him. Who has influenced your life in Christ?



If you like tea, please check out Gracious Hospitality -- she is featuring a tea marathon on her blog, with links to many others.

The Gospel and Children's Ministry

Here is a letter I recently sent to a friend in children's ministry back in Illinois, as they recently have been struggling with a large influx of uncooperative children and not enough staff to deal with them all. I print it here as an encouragement to my fellow-laborers in Christ, around the globe. May you all rejoice in the sufficiency of Christ!

Hey, Johanna,

I am writing to encourage you, Stacy, Janice and Amanda (and whoever else) about Wednesday Nights with the kids at church.

All I can do is encourage you in these 2 things:

First: your vision. What IS the vision for the children's ministry, and specifically, the Wed night crowd? Calvary's mission statement is a good place to start -- "Cooperating with God in turning spiritually dead people into fully-devoted followers of Jesus Christ". How does that look for the ministry on Wednesday nights? As I knew it, we were there to feed and get to the hearts of the children we knew well, the ones that were most likely already believers. Because the numbers were smaller than on Sunday morning, it was a time to really get to KNOW and invest in these kids -- bringing them along to being fully-devoted followers of Jesus Christ. I realize this is not the case any more. With MORE kids, and visiting kids and kids from unchurched backgrounds, you are dealing with unbelieving kids! BUT THAT'S GREAT! If anything, we probably made the mistake of assuming belief in a lot of those church kids, and should have shared the gospel with them more regularly and more clearly. NOW is the time for that. If there is anything I can encourage you in, it is the gospel. Of course kids are bad. They are sinners. We don't just want them to be good, we want them to BELIEVE.

Now you need to hash out how that will practically play out. Do you need to be more intentional about sharing the gospel EACH WEEK to all the kids gathered there -- especially in an un-canned, fresh way (not just repeating a bit about Jesus being a sort of ticket to heaven). People need to be convicted about their sin. It is good to specifically point out sin and call it sin (privately, if you are talking to a specific child -- more on that thought). Emphasizing sin and need for Christ bearing our punishment is incredibly important. Consider how you might be able to do that with the kids. During lesson? In small groups? Through songs/discussion? Maybe you need to see about recruiting more people so that you CAN take children aside one on one and talk to them when they are bad -- to show them their sin and need for a Savior! I'm not thinking that every single time a kid is bad they need to go pray a prayer, but the gospel is the ONLY ANSWER for their problem!!! We should be so encouraged because we KNOW THAT ANSWER! Perhaps there are people who could not teach a whole group of kids, but would be willing to join the team to play a role of that sort. Maybe you all should pray about that and seek to recruit people who might be able to do that. These people (and you guys) can plan to take kids who are really acting up out of the general gathering and confront them with their sin and tell them they are under God's judgment for that sin. Tell them they NEED a Savior and that they need to believe. Perhaps pray for them to be able to believe, but then stop there and watch to see if the Spirit is moving. If not, it wouldn't be best to push for a false conversion.

Second: Your encouragement. As a team, you must knit together. Having a common vision helps to do that, but you must be intentional about building one another up. After the kids are gone, your first inclination may be to discuss their behavior, but refrain from doing so, and instead turn to your fellow-laborers and encourage them! This is something I've learned from Ryan Townsend, my children's director here. When I'm finished teaching, he blows me away by blessing me: "Thank you, sister, for using your gifts here," he says. I can't believe it every time. He views our ministry as vital and precious and important and thriving, and communicates that to everyone who serves with him. It is more than just thinking positively, it is encouraging your brothers and sisters IN CHRIST and in the gospel. Everyone serving together with the children ought to be participating in this. You all can be thankful for the gospel. You all can be thankful for how Christ uses the believers in the body to minister. And you can all SAY SO. It is not just delivery, it is not just a smooth running program. It IS dirty hard work, and you ALL need to get down and dirty with one another and HELP one another by knitting your hearts together in brotherly love. A temptation can come to be knit together by sharing a common discouragement. You can all enjoy griping about the little sinners you are called to minister to, that's easy. But how is that different than gossip? Certainly, we bear one another's burdens, and it would be good to pray together, even briefly, before and/or after or at another time. But you cannot knit yourselves together to stress about how hard it is, you must not allow yourselves to do that. Embrace the children God has brought you to minister to. HE has done it. Take it from His hand with thanksgiving, and spur one another on to do the same.

Finally, I want to remind you that our joy comes in the gospel. WE ARE SINNERS. We are not so different from those wicked children. In fact, if we look at them, we see them just as God saw us, apart from His Son. You can show the children love and patience because Christ has shown YOU love and patience. I remember a few months ago, a family sitting behind me had a child misbehaving over and over during the service (it was a Lord's Supper morning, so even longer). I began to feel frustrated with the child because of how many times, over and over, he would begin to be bad, and his parents would patiently stop him. That child had no idea how loving and patient his parents were being. He kept sinning against them. Suddenly, my frustration washed away, as I sat there, remembering Christ's atonement for me. I WAS THAT CHILD. I presumed upon a patient and loving Lord who loved me and called me to be his own. I saw my own sinfulness and foolishness played out in this child's behavior.

Friend, I will pray for you, and seek to encourage you in any way I know how. Have confidence in God's Providence. He has not brought you to a place that He has not before ordained. His grace is sufficient.

Love, Gretchen

Fellow-workers, a book I'd recommend is Ted Tripp's Shepherding a Child's Heart. This book is for parents, but I found it extremely helpful thinking about what my task was in the children's lives in my care.

T4G Sale

So we bought up the leftover books from Together for the Gospel, and now we're having a huge sale at the bookstore where I work. Great stuff. All kinds of books from Crossway, Banner of Truth, Christian Focus, P&R and Baker Academic. Here are a few I'm highlighting:

Seeing with New Eyes by David Powlison for $7.97. My friend Kathleen who is a counseling student here at Southern said about this book: "It made me peel away the layers of sin in my heart, layer by layer like an onion. It changed my life."

Morning & Evening by Charles Spurgeon, prices varied. We have these in pretty gift editions, which would be perfect graduation or Father's Day gifts. I like the skinny black leather-like one.

He Gave Us a Valley, Digging Ditches, Living Sacrifice, Living Faith by Dr. Helen Roseveare. JUST what I was looking for! I was wanting some new autobiograhies by a woman -- especially one who has served the Lord through trials and hardship. Perhaps you have read Noel Piper's Faithful Women and Their Extraordinary God which features Helen Roseveare. About these books, Noel says: "Each time I read one of her accounts, I want to be like her, I want to know God as she does."

But there's lots more, too. Stop by if you live in town, or you can find the phone # from Southern's website, or leave me a comment if you want anything shipped to you! Happy Reading!

Piper: "Become a Sage"

I had the blessing of tasting a bit of the Together for the Gospel conference this week, which was primarily for pastors, but open to anyone to attend. I was certainly in the minority of women present -- less than 100, I'd guess. I mentioned to a friend it was strange to see the line outside the men's room at a huge conference like this and then be able to walk right in the ladies' room!

Most of the direct exhortations were to the pastors in attendance -- which was fitting and appropriate, but this morning during the panel discussion, John Piper briefly addressed the women present with a word about the need for women who are "sages". By this he described women who walked with God, dug deep into theology, experienced the fellowship of Christ's suffering over the course of their lives as they experienced unbelieving husbands, wayward children, medical conditions, etc. and as a result have emerged into their 40s, 50s and 6os as profoundly wise women. It would be fitting for younger generations of men and women to go to these females sages and ask for their insight. Piper described women who on the exterior were gentle, loving, sweet and kind but had a rod of steel down their back -- built in there by the experience of suffering for Christ's name sake. I automatically thought of women who fit this bill -- the "sages" of my life, if you will. Perhaps you can think of them as well. (Here is a picture of my favorite sage -- Elisabeth Elliot -- whose words have influenced and guided me more than any other woman's. I commend to you her books, especially The Path of Suffering. If you never again read a book I recommend, please read this one). Just being older does not make you a sage -- but clinging to the supremacy of Christ through all the battles that a Christian must endure, saturating yourself and your mind in the Word, will in time, make you just such a person.

I was challenged. I want to be a woman like this. I sat there, listening to Piper describing these honorable women, and feeling closer and closer to that age than ever. Thinking about all the silly things in my life that I have made more important than they are. What do those things matter -- at all -- in the light of the glorious reward awaiting us? Can I, by His unlimited grace, choose to endure suffering for His name's sake? Can I look at life with new eyes, not asking "why me?" but "Why NOT me?" when I see suffering taking place? Can I choose to take every cough, every late night with an ill family member, every rough day on the job, every misunderstanding with someone I love, every hurt, every slight, every death and disappointment, and lay them on the divine altar as a sacrifice of praise to the honor and glory of Christ? By His grace -- YES. And so can you.

Dear female reader: ask yourself what you are holding onto that keeps you from loving Christ supremely. He is Supremely Valuable. Do I see Him as such? He is Altogether Good. Do I question His goodness when I experience discomfort? Friends, though we live in a society that is always all about comfort, I know that many times your trials and pains are true and real. It is not their reality that keeps us from rejoicing in the midst of them. If the trials were all joy, no pain at all, then what would be glorious about rejoicing? No, it is in this real suffering that you will know the sweetest and closest fellowship with Christ -- the fellowship of His suffering! "Therefore, let us go to him outside the camp and bear the reproach he endured. For here we have no lasting city, but we seek a city that is to come."

Sister -- consider the reward! And count it all joy!

I Get to Go!

Today through Thursday is the Together for the Gospel Conference here in Louisville. I just found out that a friend of ours, Shu Wong, cannot go, even though he paid for the registration, so he's letting me go in his place! WOW! A few weeks ago I was feeling really left out about missing everything, but it turns out I can go to the session tonight and tomorrow afternoon (I get off work early!).

It's been crazy around here. I've seen people from college (Ben Wright, various Wredbergs, Luke Akin) at chapel and in the bookstore, and I'm hoping to see some people from my Illinois past as well (Pastor Kim, Kirby, Scott Gunter). Plus my cousin Elizabeth's husband Paul! I wonder who else?

If you are reading this, will you be there?

The right place at the right time. . .

Josh and I have been in Washington D.C. for the last 4 days, just for a sightseeing getaway, and we were delighted to find out this was opening while we were there! We actually didn't know about it until the night before, when Josh bought a copy of the Post and saw an article about it. "Hey, Gret, here's an article about rare books you might like," he said. I couldn't believe it! I read about Jefferson's book collection last month when I read A Gentle Madness. Now it is reconstructed and open to the public for viewing!

The next discovery we made was the next morning after breakfast. We consulted a map and headed off in the general direction of the Library of Congress from the house where we stayed (with the gracious Ingold's). A couple blocks into our jaunt, and there we were! We had no idea we were so close. There was a ceremony taking place on the Library steps where the Librarian of Congress along with a couple Representatives (sorry, can't remember who!) and good old Thomas Jefferson and Benjamin Franklin opened the 3 brass front doors to the Library. We were in line right away, and got to enjoy wandering around a rather empty Library of Congress.



Jefferson's library was set up the way he wanted it -- in the shape of a conch shell, so that as you walked into it, you were surrounded by books. He separated them into 3 classifications: Memory, Reason and Imagination. I was delighted to find his section of tragedies, and see which copies were originally his (they marked his original books with a green ribbon marker, the one's replaced with yellow ribbons).



After the Jefferson exhibit started filling up, we walked around reading the quotes on the around the walls when a kind elderly gentleman who worked as a guide encouraged us to visit the main reading room. "It's the crown beauty of the Library" he told us. And it was. Normally, the reading room is only open to those who have a pass, but on this special day it was open to all visitors. And they let us take pictures! We were just crazy about this place. Above us were huge larger than life statues of great writers of different genres -- religion: Moses and St. Paul, art: Shakespeare, etc. We were distanced from the books, of course, but the reading desks were lovely, and Josh and I happened to have our own books along with us!






Of all the places we went on our trip, this was my favorite.

Happy Birthday, Josh!

Well, I'm a day late in writing this, because Josh has been working on an exegesis paper until all hours, so I have not had access to our computer at all. This is not a complaint -- I'm proud of how smart Josh is and how hard he works.

So my husband is 29, like me. The longer we are married, and the more we are around one another, the more grateful I am that the Lord has given me this person to walk through life with. Here are some Josh-specific things that I have come to enjoy more than I thought possible back when we were celebrating his 20th birthday:

• His love for the Word, and truth. It is amazing to watch someone grow in godliness before your very eyes; it is even more amazing when it is your husband. His growth is visible. He is far more patient, more humble, and more passionate about the gospel at 29 than ever before. I say those things to honor him. He was a great guy when I married him. But even after a sort of "Reformation" period in his life, I see his growth abounding and not plateauing at all. I cannot say what a blessing it is to have your chief spiritual adviser and accountability partner to share your home with.
• His love for people. A few years ago, Josh might have noted this as a main struggle, spiritually. You could never guess that now by the way he invests in his friends, and kindly loves the unlovable around him. He reaches out to the nonbelievers at work, showing the greatest love for them by sharing the gospel with them at his own personal risk of incurring their judgment or dislike.
  
• His adaptability. Being flexible and adaptable comes mainly from living your life not insisting on your own rights, and building up expectations. I have recently noticed Josh, who has always been rather easy-going, intentionally lay down his own preferences to adapt to what others would prefer. This is a quality that makes him a delight to live with. When Josh says he doesn't care what we have for supper, he really means it! He doesn't have an idol of food that must be satisfied every time he eats -- he is satisfied in Christ. What a blessing for a wife who is doing the best she can, and is always spread a bit thin in the homemaking department.
  

Happy Birthday, Josh! You are an example of the kind of husband a girl should hope and pray for, and I am so proud to be able to refer to you in that way.

Prizes and Packages

The March Reading Challenge is officially closed. I hear from many of you that you dove right in and appreciated the challenge to read more or certain things. We'll have to pull it out again next year! Here are the winners of the 2008 Challenge:

1st place -- Donette. She wins the C.S. Lewis mug -- top prize that fits her book choice well (Prince Caspian). Nett, send me an e-mail with your address, and I'll drop your prize in the mail. Or maybe you can promise to meet up with me the first of May when we go to MBBC for graduation!

2nd place -- J. A. Ingold. He wins the Booklover's Borrow Book. John, you only are getting second place because you admitted you "barely" finished. However, you win the bonus prize of having your prize hand delivered on your own doorstep in just a few days! Along with the prize you get a 4-day visit from Josh and Gretchen! (Confused readers, Josh and I are going to D.C. during spring break, and the kind Ingolds have graciously offered to host us!).

Finally, I wanted to shout out to the best mother-in-law in the world, Lennis, for this cute Personal Library Kit! My camera is not cooperating, so I'll have to load pictures, later, but the kit is quite charming. It makes me want to play library! Who wants to check something out? Stamp, stamp! Thanks, Lennis!

Aunt Diane

This is my Aunt Diane, one of my dad's 4 sisters (pictured here with my Grandma Benzing who passed away in December). She is the 3rd of 9 children, mother of 3, and grandmother of 12. Can you tell why I thought she looked like a movie star when I was a little girl? I always thought my glamorous aunt looked like Jackie Kennedy or Annette Funicello. She certainly has the poise and grace to match her spunk. Aunt Diane has the aptitude to make everyday life enjoyable -- reading on her deck, playing with the grandkids, or laughing hysterically over old Facebook pictures. "Celebrate life" she says, "Just like my mom did."

Diane has been married for 44 years to Bob Adrian. I just love this picture of her walking down the isle with my Grandpa. She fell in love with a man who has a pastor's heart, and so in her marriage, she has also been a ministry partner for 44 years. Since that is what I am training for right now, I asked her to share something to encourage young women whose husbands are in ministry. Here is what she said:

"I have been fortunate in all the churches we have served in that they have let me be who I am and serve where my heart is. Even though I do not play the piano, which is necessary in some churches for a pastor's wife, I have found other places to serve. My first responsibility is to my God, then my husband and children. The success in ministry is found the the changed lives of people who sit under our teaching & ministries-ESPECIALLY THOSE IN OUR OWN HOME."

I know Aunt Diane has tasted the fruit of years of ministry, both to those in her own home as well as in her church. When I asked her how she sees herself growing in godliness and love for the Savior, she wisely answered "Growing up in a Christian home or even being a Pastor's wife helps but does not assure one of this personal relationship with God." I appreciate her humility and teachable spirit -- she realized the importance of watching her walk in her 40's, and has enjoyed the journey of growing ever since. In addition to Bible studies at church, she also leads a small group of women who are giving themselves to prayer.

I'm so thankful for my Aunt Diane who is beautiful both inside and out!